Watkins Auditorium was the place and 9:09 p.m. was the time for the SAC’s final 909 comedy series of the semester.

Comedians Eric Nieves and Steve Byrne lit up the stage, playing to a UTM crowd who must have forgotten to show up.

Eric Nieves, a Puerto Rican comic from the Bronx, has been featured on Showtime at the Apollo and BET’s Comicview.

Nieves started the show with a set about his Latino heritage and the experience of listening to country music on the trip here from the Paducah airport. After asking the audience if they enjoyed rap, Nieves began a tirade about white guys who are into hip-hop.

“All of a sudden, these white kids were all hard, like, ‘I’m from the fg street, kid, what!’ and I’m like- ‘Wait a minute. You live in a fg house, you’re not from the street. Thugs don’t mow the lawn!’ ”

He didn’t hesitate to weigh in on the eternal battle-of-the-sexes, either.

“Women make men do stupid s**t. Women are crazy, but men are just stupid.” Nieves continued on about women and men, and how each sex has a different code of honor when it comes to roommates bringing someone home for the night.

“Men will just leave. They’ll sleep on the f*g floor outside, but not women. Women will be like “why the fk I gotta leave my room for your dirty st?!” He had harsher words about the fairer sex, as well.

“Men won’t normally approach a woman they don’t know because women are f*****g mean without even trying. So what do real men do? We stare at you.”

The comic also spoke on the virtues of remaining a virgin in the college years.

“It’s good to be a virgin. You can catch stuff, like kids. My Puerto Rican mother always ask me- is your sperm working? I say ‘it looked like it was working all right last time I looked.’ ”

After Eric Nieves, comic Steve Byrne came to the stage. Byrne has been on Comicview, Comedy Central’s Premium Blend, Chappelle’s Show and Jimmy Kimmel Live.

Byrne moved into material that highlighted his experience as a server at an Applebee’s restaurant.

“You see this waitress and she asks you if you want fajita poppers or a pina colada, and you think ‘what a wonderful person.’ Guess what? She’s not. She’s really a single mother of three, b*****g the manager doing a line of coke in the kitchen with the line cook that they bought from the dishwasher!”

Byrne had words for guys who get into wrecks and want to fight. “It’s like, ‘Dude, what is your problem? We almost killed each other but now we’re safe- now get out here so we can beat the s**t out of each other!’ ”

SAC’s 909 comedy series will start up again in the spring semester.